Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Untitled

if you could see what I see
if you could see how far I ride
and the horizon never grows dark

you would be ashamed.

Monday, April 29, 2013

It Is Too A Sport

give me a spade and give me the field,
give me a spawn and get me unveiled,
give me your boon bright handkerchief,
and I'll show you how I compete.

I need no helmet,
nor mud-caked boots.
I need no padding,
nor guard for tooth.
I need no balls,
nor dyed shirt.
I need just a direction
and people to hurt.

I won't attack you direct,
no, that's not the way;
I'll cut the ground out
from whence you stay.

Standing still is the worst defense,
and there's an audience upon the fence.

give me a spade and give me the field,
give me a spawn and get me unveiled,
give me your boon bright handkerchief,
and I'll show you how I compete.

I need no reward,
just standing tall
upon the field while
mine enemies fall.
I need no trophy,
just my trusty spade,
look down to see
where the bodies laid.

I won't take revenge
if I take a fall,
the world's too tiny for
everyone to stand tall.

Running around, eyes on your toes,
try to jump as high as the sky goes.

give me a spade and give me the field,
give me a spawn and get me unveiled,
give me your boon bright handkerchief,
and I'll show you how I compete.

give me a field and I'll give you a try,
give me a stadium to play and to fly,
let me bring my coat-of-arms and motif
and I'll show you how I love to spleef.

Sunday, April 28, 2013

Invitation to Outer Space

I'm not trapped here on the ground,
but every time I spread my wings
there's something out there chasing me...
darkness bringing poor tidings.


I don't want to tear you limb-by-limb,
just catch and hold you close.
I want a flying companion
where the sky ever grows.


I can flit and flicker homeward,
I can dance across the sky,
I can suckle on poison trees,
but I dare not go so high.


I can hang up in the air,
don't need wax to hold me aloft,
but it's so lonely in the sky
and your flowers look so soft.


No, don't follow me down here,
nay, keep away!
I don't want-- what are you doing?
--Oh, wow! I never knew the world this way.

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Her (Mature Content)

Mature Content
--

I pulled her into my apartment roughly, dragging her by the neck of her shirt, shut the door with a kick, and then shoved her against the wall behind it, pinning her arms behind her back.

"Do you know how difficult it is for me to... Continue reading on DreamCruder

Saturday, April 20, 2013

See The World

slow down and take your time,
see the world in a new light.
let skin manifest inside,
and life just could turn out alright.

turn and look another way,
see the world with new eyes.
check if your head matches your toes,
and maybe learn to fly.

soft and fluffy, clouds do seem,
see the world as if a dream.
stop wond'ring if you could juggle these
and please try not to sneeze.

weigh down so it can't waft away,
see the world's stubborn greys.
hold your place, watch your head,
in case something follows your tread.

change again, the norm returns,
see the world just as you've learned.
though the filters lie inert,
still does your mind work...
and differences you can still discern.

--
Inspired by Quantum Conundrum

Thursday, April 18, 2013

They Don't Make Lifejackets For This

I can turn off my editing brain,
I can turn off and let it go.
let the words come as they wish,
unedited, smoothly flow.

I can turn up the right side
and turn down the left;
I can dive into my dreamscape,
from a fully imagined cleft.

I can spin in ravaging circles
as the timer counts on down,
I can think about everything
as the world spins spinning 'round

I can list all of the reasons,
I can argue every cause,
I can plot out my own visions,
I can wander without pause.

I can turn my lonely circle,
as I walk within the crowd;
I can hunt and peck for answers,
inside me or out-loud.

I can do all these things,
but I can't turn it off.
my brain never stops working,
never stops tearing, never coughs.

I can rhyme to the end,
as apocalypse comes and goes;
I can keep the words on flying,
unstoppered, unslowed.

I can't make the words repeat,
I can't make them go away,
I can only hold them in
until I turn another page.

If I can't wave them away,
if they never stop,
I can't make them come again,
can't make them restart.

I can only blunder on,
through the drought and the rain,
I can only turn up the volume,
and pay attention to what they say.

there's a voice in my head always whispering,
and a thought always wanting to be heard.
there's something that won't be silenced,
not owned by dragons or by birds.

there's a voice that's calling me
to spin the words that I think,
every shout, every grumble,
every patter, every plink.

so when I set my fingers dancing,
there's a dam that opens wide
to a lake that's always filling,
while I'm drowning deep inside.

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

You Don't See Me

you'll never admit it,
you'll never recognize,
you'll never look at me
with unjudging eyes,

you'll never consider
that there is some truth
when I say we're similar,
and got written proof.

you'll never believe me,
you'll never try
to understand these words,
but when we cry

both our tears fall
from the same sort of cause.
when you write those words,
you'll never pause

and realize that I'm out here,
feeling the same things too
since your world holds
no me, just you.

Monday, April 15, 2013

Success and Death Are The Only Antidotes

how can I tell you what's wrong,
when I don't really know what's right?
I've got too many things moving,
something keeping me up all night.

I've got this deep burning hunger,
a thirst that rivals my throat,
a policy of trying to go higher
though trapped in a sinking boat.

I'm bailing and bailing and bailing,
but the water just keeps flowing in.
sometimes there's blood,
sometimes there's sharks,
so it doesn't matter if I can swim.

I'm sinking and I'm drowning,
because my gaze is set too high.
while my body's still treading water,
my mind is trying to fly.

I'm sick with this desire
to rise higher than most dare,
I'm infected with this feeling
trapped in a cupboard under the stairs.

but there's no magic in this world,
nothing new for me to bring,
just a selfish prayer
and a malnourished offering.

there's no god for me to worship,
no altar I can burn,
no promises I can make,
that will slow this twister's turn;

there's no way I can ever stand
among the stars over my head
because my ship's still sinking
and I'm trapped inside my head.

I'm solo and slowly drowning,
and I can't be good enough
for my own personal critic
that chokes me like a glove.

I'm sinking and rowing circles,
my rudder's bent to hell,
I'm convulsing with delusions
that this is all good for my health.

the ache that's got me choking
on the ever-present pain.
please put me out of misery
since you cannot cure me sane.

Careful, It Might Be Contageous

a hemorrhage that won't let me be happy,
it's an ache that won't go away,
a contagion that keeps me caring,
a debility for my every day;

it doesn't give me convulsions,
but it lives cancerously inside;
it's a malady of misery--
incurable 'til I die.

my stomach doesn't get upset,
my temp doesn't drop down low,
my joints don't get inflamed,
but when it attacks, you'll know.

it's an endemic of wishing,
a seizure of make-believe,
a bug resistant to catharsis...
I've got the dreamer's disease.

Saturday, April 13, 2013

Untitled

how long can you wait
for the earth to let go,
and freely drift up into space?

how would you stand
unmoving but grand,
if you can't wait to leave this place?

pull up by your fingers
and push up with your toes;
try and gain every inch
to see how far it goes.

if you never take the chance
to take in a fresh new scene,
you'll never fall,
you'll never fail,
you'll never know another green.

I Don't Roar

Corner of no and where
We're very much alone out here.

This is my window out into the world,
thirteen by eleven, impossibly deep.
I sit and watch it all fly by,
you work and live, I wait and sleep.

It still gets very crowded,
though I've got no company;
thoughts always coming
and always clamoring.

I just wish I could reach through,
and touch with more than my words.
Or jack my hardline in
so my heart doesn't hurt.

I've wanted to be a lion,
a cat or a fox,
but instead I'm just wallpaper
trapped inside the box.

You might as well though,
I have a mighty roar. 


--
Italicized text from Jubal Early, "Objects in Space," of Firefly

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Futura Expectat

you turned me down and looked away,
didn't care for me to stay,
didn't hope for my return,
and made all those bridges burn.

now an ad to hire on
me, my like, upon the lawn,
me, my path, moves away.
I won't give you the time of day.

new chances will come to bloom:
I still hold hope, and it comes soon.
I need not you to keep me warm,
trust not you to do no harm.

you let me have a time to yearn,
a time to move on, to discern
breaking dawn of new days,
and a new place to stay.

Monday, April 1, 2013

A Separate Peace

adrift in the deepness,
lost in the black,
floating forgotten:
they're not coming back.

my meter started flashing,
so I turned off the HUD;
I know what will happen--
it can't come soon enough.

in the meantime, I'm still here,
between the silence and the stars...
I can feel the universe breathing,
calming my pounding heart.

I don't mind that they're not coming,
because I won't die alone:
I found my peace in time;
I'm finally at home.