Saturday, November 17, 2012

You're Not The Prize (Mature)

Mature Content
--

don't open your mouth and ask
don't open your mind and wonder
don't bother--don't gasp--don't stutter
just go back to being last.

I don't like to ask for help,
I don't like to call us friends.
you won't be coming along with me,
you won't be there at the end.

I've been flapping my arms so hard,
but I can't get off the ground.
I've been shooting dirty looks around,
but they're not going very far.

don't close or hide your eyes,
you still won't see my hand.
don't not peek behind the curtain,
you won't see hidden plans.

don't close your mind and forget,
don't close your mouth and hush,
don't get in line, or bother much...
just lay down your final bet.

I Must Be Held Responsible (I Fell In Love First)

no matter our age, we always find death
in the arms of lovers, dreamers, friends.
no matter our promise, our bright shining star,
no matter who we could be, or who we are.

no matter our progress, cold hands reach out,
cupping our warmth, final breath, final shout.
no matter the distance, the carriage always finds
each of us on out fateful night.

for some, it's just time, for some, just cause,
for some, it's counted down to the final pause,
for some, it's foretold with much ado,
for some, it's just them following you.

for me, it's been there for more than six years,
time mostly spent holding back fears.
for me, I'm not counting back days,
time lately spent counting the ways.

in my dreams, I'll be rejoining her,
but I believe there's nothing, no heaven o'er earth;
in my waking, I know I fell in love first,
and losing her, I learned of my curse.

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

The Second-to-Last Mask (Mature)

Mature Content
--

"It's getting late. I should be going." She sat up slowly. "Thank you."

"You're welcome. Do you need to be somewhere tomorrow?"

"No, it's my day off."

I held open my arms. "You can stay if you like. I think this visit has done you some good. I know it has for me."

"I want to but..." She frowned, trying not to say the wrong words.

"You're not comfortable trusting me while you're asleep to not start any funny business."

"It's easier to trust you when I'm awake."

"I'm not offended, but I wonder if I can do something about it."

"Hmm?"

"You know my body will react. I have as much control over that as I've claimed for my imagination. It's been reacting since you stopped by. But we both know that neither of us is looking for that type of thing. Hell, my body has reacted while sleeping next to someone I'm not attracted to, as ugly as me."

"You're not... I mean..."

"I know what you mean. The mind sometimes goes both ways. It wants to stay but fears staying. Let me show you something." I sat up behind her, scrambled around my bed and climbed off, then walked the few paces to my closet. I leaned in, and pulled out a white shirt on a hanger.

"Is that...?"

"Yes. I picked it up last year. Always wanted one and found it on sale. I tried it on once and damn near got stuck. If I wear this..."

"Then you can't do anything."

"You're still free to change your mind in the middle of the night, just please help me out of it before you leave."

She smiled, a rare sight in my presence, when she took off the second to last mask. "This changes everything."

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Denial of Service

I got me a carriage
and I hitched up a ride,
pulled up beside a reaper
and invited him inside.

"Now's not yet your time
but still you hurry to go,
pull back the dark curtains,
and let the horses slow.

You'll see her when you're ready,
she'll lead you on your way.
Unless this is a kidnapping,
you will not die today."

"What about tomorrow?"
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . "No."