I come here, and sit. I sit here, and watch. I don't come closer, I don't participate. I know I don't belong here. I don't belong anywhere but back at my place, alone, nose buried in a book, or staring at a screen trying to write one.
I used to feel senses of belonging, moments in time when I was with others and I didn't feel like I was intruding...
Now, I only feel awkward, like I shouldn't have come in the first place, like even looking longingly on is tresspassing.
I told them I would wear this hat and this feather, and now I just want to stuff it in my bag and take the long way around.
I have made myself a truly solitary creature, and there is no antidote.