I picked up the scalpel and looked at it queerly. The nurses and doctors around me glanced at me nervously. A young tech, who was standing right next to me at the time, took my elbow gently with one hand; with his other hand, he carefully took the scalpel and turned it around.
"It goes this way, sir."
I giggled. He was funny. My chuckle must have been distorted coming through the paper mask, because the other doctors were looking concerned. I think it was because they couldn't see my broad smile that everybody tells me is reassuring.
"Come on, folks, let's get to work!" I did a poor moonwalk closer to the body, and another tech appeared at my other elbow, gently holding on. I pulled them closer to the table, and leaned forward ready to make the first incision.
I was still grinning when my alarm went off, and even still when I walked into work. That doctor was a lot like me, I was certain, because I'm a virgin and I work at an adult store. But none of this stuff I sell can hurt anybody, right? I've read up on these things and know where they go, mostly.